Another Fine Mess Part 6

A big apology is in order for the long delay in getting back here... no explanations really--just got sidetracked with other work and projects.

The plane touched down with a gentle bump and Lauren looked for an escape route. But the bedroom she was locked in, despite it's luxurious touches, was still nothing more than a prison. Throught the tiny window of the plane, Lauren saw the silver case containing her nemesis being offloaded and carefully shunted into a large six wheeled truck.

"Well, if I can't break out here," she thought, "I will have to try another time. I just need to stay alive." So resolved, she waited, and then stood demurely as the cabin door turned and opened. As she expected, three large men with AK47s stood at the door. Behind them, Hao Chin smiled and dangled a set of thick metal handcuffs.

Putting her hands up at shoulder height, Lauren staggered forward, the stilletto heels of the maid's outfit pitching her forward, and almost onto her nose. "Bloody Hell," she stammered. "How can anyone WALK in these things?"

"Boris expects YOU to do that O'Rourke," said Hao Chin. He caught the comely crimelady and spun her around. Lauren almost pitched forward again, but Hao Chin caught her wrist, and slipped a handcuff around it, cinching it too tight.

"Oww!!!" protested Lauren. Hao Chin ignored her, however; and popped the other bracelet around her opposite hand. He pulled Lauren's struggling body against hsi own corpulent form and squeezed her plump breast with one hand.

"You've lost, O'Rourke. And this makes us even for Seville, Copenhagen and Queen City. Enjoy your servitude bitch. I'm sure Boris will see it drag on as much as possible." Hao Chin snoothed down the front of Lauren's red dress, his hand lingering just at the crotch for a moment as he felt the sexy woman one last time.

Lauren shot a hard, cold look at Hao Chin. "You'll regret this Chin. I'll get meself free, an there's not a country, not an island, not a piece of ground anywhere on this earth where you can hide. You're a dead man."

Chin laughed, but it was weak and without mirth. A look of uncertainty hinted at his features until he mastered it. Then he pushed Lauren into the guards. "Take her to the truck," he said in flawless, though accented Russian. "And keep 2 guns on her at all times."

Lauren smouldered, but held her tongue, at least until the van started. The silver case containing White Owl unnerved her, but she was made of stronger stuff and studied the men with the guns. They could have been carbon copies of one another or rather granite for all the dialog they offered. So Lauren tried her own. "GRU?" she asked the one who appeared to be the leader.

"Nyet," he replied. "Spetsnaz"

"Crap" thought Lauren. Special Forces were always hard to deal with; their loyalty was fierce and they were brilliant and chancy fighters. Like Lauren, they seldom knew when to lie down and quit. But if Boris has hired them, he'd passed some serious money to the Powers that Be. That meant he was reorganizing--possibly stretched really thin. This would be knowledge Lauren could use.

After a long period, the truck stopped and the cuns once again prodded Lauren to alight on a cobblestone courtyard of a large dacha overlooking Lake Baikal. The bright sun was high, and Lauren blinked then stumbled forward into a palatial estate. She watched again as the sarcophagus containing White Owl was carried into an office just inside the foyer. Already Lauren had spotted 5 security cameras and three laser points at the windows and door. Additionally she had plotted at least 2 escape plans and was calculating the odds of each when the door to the office opened and Lauren was motioned (at gunpoint) into the office.

The office rivalled Lauren's though the decor was more tasteful and subdued. A large photograph of Red Square, illuminated by fireworks hung in the corner, and White Owl's case leaned against it. Across the room at a mahogany desk, though sat Boris.

"Velcome Lauren," he said, with a broad smile across his arachnid like features. "I am much appreciatink your gift of Vhite Owvel and of your own serwices to my humble cause."

Lauren strode daintily across the room and lay herself across the table in what she hoped was a seductive pose. "It was my pleasure, Boris honey. But you didn't have to bring me clear across the world for your little joke."

"Oh but I did! You see, you are nefer leavink! You haf heard old Russian prowerb, 'keep your friends close and your enemies closer?' Vhat closer place than to haf you actually under my vatch, hey?"

He chortled and said, "Come, ve have wodka to celebrate, yes? I haf maid fetch it for us." He picked up a brass bell and shook it, giving a melodic tinkle. Nothing happened.

"Hmm, I vonder vhat happened?" he growled. He shook the bell again. No answer.

"Ahhh I am beginnink to understand. The maid job vas chust filled." He pulled a nasty looking pistol from a drawer in his desk. "By YOU O'Rourke. You'll find the wodka in the cabinet, so get to it."

Scowling daggers, Lauren held her ground. "No."

to be continued

Another Fine Mess Part 5

Lauren struggled to come to consciousness. Her mouth was dry and her tongue felt like a thousand gerbils had marched across it in their sweat socks.Moreover, she was disoriented, and felt out of control. None of these were feelings that Lauren O'Rourke LIKED feeling. Of course there was that time in Belgrade, but THAT had been consentual.

As she struggled with her orientation, Lauren realized she had been undressed and left in nothing but her bra and panties. Her clothes, always so immaculate were no where to be seen and her proper fedora was perched across the room on a wig stand.

"All right, I'm movin'" thought Lauren. "An' movin' fast. A jet?" A glance out the small porthole proved Lauren's assumtions correct. She sat up, and put her feet on the thick carpet, then surveyed the cabin.

Her eyes lit on a steel sarcophagus, where White Owl continued her vacant stare. "This is all YOUR fault, Red Robin," she muttered. Swaying to her feet, Lauren tried to cross the room, only to be stopped by the heavy chains around her ankles.

"Someone wants to play kinky games," she said. Her head was pounding though, and the tough crime boss sat on the bed wishing for a cigar, Scotch and a bottle of aspirin. But when the cabin door opened, Lauren's headache stopped and she snarled in fury.

"YOU! How DARE you kidnap me! There's not a country on earth you'll be safe in Hao Chin, once I get free. And I will. There's no one who can keep Lauren O' Rourke. Well maybe only one person who MIGHT be able to keep me and he's ..."

"He is Boris Andreyavich Neyk. The head of the mafia in all of Russia."

"Boris the Bloody Spider? He was cooling his heels in a maximum security prison in Siberia last I heard. How did he get free? What did I ever do to him?" Lauren asked indignantly.

Hao Chin settled into a comfortable chair, just out of Lauren's reach. "He said you would ask that. He told me one word. 'Odessa'."

Despite the serious situation, Lauren smiled. "My girls saved his from the Honey Trap he was running there, an' left HIM to fill the bill. He looked rather fetching in that tight little French Maid outfit. The Beyalarus government ripped him a new one then too. But his money taled and he was escorted back to the border--first class. But that was at least two years ago. The man has no sense of humor."

"I disagree," said Hao Chin. "Mr. Neyk has quite the sense of humor. It is why he requested you be wearing this when you are brought before him." He proffered a box toward Lauren. The mob queen opened it, then frowned.

"Never in a million years. There's no way in Bloody Hell I'll ever wear this."

Chin shrugged. "It's either this or nothing," he said.

"I'll take me chances with nothing then," said Lauren, defiantly. "It's not like he's not seen me in the buff before."

"We shall see." Chin stood, and opened the door to Lauren's cabin. "This flight is almost over. We will be landing in Mr Neyk's private retreat in an hour. I would suggest....compliance with his wishes. Mr Neyk can become most disagreeable. But I believe you are already aware of that fact?"

As the door closed, Lauren's eyes remained fixed where Chin's retreating body had been. "More than you'll ever know."

She shuddered in the cold and sat back on the bed. As she glanced out the window, she could see the deep forests of central Russia and tried to remember where Neyk might have his lairs. Lake Baikal came to mind and Lauren frowned. "middle of Bloody Nowhere!" she muttered. "An' even if I DO get away the only way out is through the damn Gobi or through Mongolia! She looked at the sarcophagus once more and wished she'd paid better attention to Suzy Q's lecture on the devices.

"Just my luck, the one time I actually DO succeed in getting rid of the Big Bad Birdie, its the one time I could use a friend--or a heroine." Lauren felt a cold wind on the back of her neck and shuddered.

"Just like Hao Chin to turn up the cold," she said. "But if he thinks I'm going to wear THAT..." She shuddered again.

"Lauren, ye can't be daft if you want to survive this, an' bring down the big bad Spider. You'll need your cunnin' and all the tools you can use." With a sigh, she opened the box again, and slid into the bright red satin dress and apron.

(to be continued)

Another Fine Mess part 4

The gleaming blade hovered inches above White Owl's vacant face. Felicia's eyes flashed with eagerness as the scalpel traced the air above the slumbering heroine's head. "You should have been mine," she hissed. "It's not fair that we went to all that trouble and got nothing. Lauren is too money hungry to pay attention to all my needs..."

The scalpel drooped, touching the heroine's tanned skin just on the left of her slowly rising and falling breasts. "It wouldn't take much," mused Felicia, aloud; "just a quick little jab here, and you'd bleed out so fast, no one could save you. I wonder if..."

"All right lass, that'll be enough of that." The dim lighting in the lab suddenly flashed brighter and Felicia threw her arm over her eyes. Yukiko crossed the room with catlike grace and deftly plucked the scalpel from Felicia's hand.

"She is disarmed Lauren," reported Yukiko. "What is your wish regarding her?"

"Eh, let 'er go," said Lauren. "I might have done the same thing meself."

Lauren turned to Felicia, and scolded. "I'm gonna cut your pay on this caper though. If you can't follow orders, ya gotta be disciplined." Felicia's pout nearly melted Lauren's icy heart, and the Queen of Crime had to steel herself against the angelic face.

"Now scoot," said Lauren, dismissing Felicia from guard duty. Yukiko sighed.

"What?" said Lauren.

"Nothing," said Yukiko, averting her eyes. Lauren balled her fists, then unclenched them.

"Look, love," she said to Yukiko. "When you're running this gang, after I've retired to Singapore, THEN you can do things by whatever book you want. But until then, this is my show, OK?"

Yukiko nodded and the faintest hint of a smile crossed her face. The two women then turned back to the unconscious heroine.

White Owl was still bound in the pink ribbon, her arms and legs tight. The gleaming band on her head pulsed slightly, indicating the brain drain was still working as well. "So what's next?" asked Lauren, her voice slightly above a whisper.

"There is no need to lowah yo' voice sugah," said Suzy Q, emerging from a lab door at the other end of the room. "She's so fah gone, even a GPS wouldn't help her none." The honey blond crossed to Lauren and frowned.

"Ah jes heard about F'licia. Ah'm sorry I wasn't there."

"No matter--what's done is done," replied Yukiko.

"As fo' what's next," continued Suzy Q, ignoring Yukiko; "well, then. First, we have a glass case filled with inert gasses. White Turkey here will be loaded into the case, an' fitted with an oxygen and narcotic mask. She'll have enough air to breathe, but won't be able to form a conscious thought. Once that' s sealed, she'll be packed in a normal crate for Lauren to deliver."

"An' don't forget the lovely money," said Lauren. She stepped to the inert form of White Owl and smiled. "I'll be rid of you once an' for all, Stormy Petral!"

Yukiko piped up. "Are you sure you want to trust Hao Chin? You were pretty evasive when you first met him, and this time--well something doesn't feel right."

Lauren tossed her head back and laughed. "He had courage, I'll grant him that. Didn't flinch once when you offered to kill him. No, he's earned this. An' it's not like I'll be alone out there. You ladies will be set up just atop the hill, out of sight. Anythin' goes wrong, you're to swoop in like the Avengin' Furies themselves! We'll dispose of Hao Chin an' Ruddy Duck at the same time if he tries to cross us."

****

A cuckoo clock struck 9 pm as Lauren latched the back of her delivery van. Inside was the carefully packaged container full of White Owl. Lauren adjusted her jaunty fedora blew a kiss at the back of the van and gunned it out of the warehouse. Thirty minutes of driving left Queen City well behind her and Lauren followed along the river road toward the rendezvous point.

She turned onto the private road, and along the two ruts leading to the small valley where Hao Chin would be waiting. But as Lauren entered the clearing, she could only see the bend in the river--no car or truck waiting for her.

"What in bloody hell?" she asked, killing the engine and shutting off the lights. She wasn't eager to break radio silence with her assistants, and so she fretted. But across the river, she saw a bright spotlight aimed at the clearing.

"Of course, it's brilliant," muttered Lauren. "Of course he had a boat." Lauren stepped out of the van and watched as the boat drew closer. So intent was she on watching the boat, she failed to hear the helicopter until it was flying overhead. When the beating of the rotor alerted her, Lauren looked up as a dark helicopter sprayed a thick, cloying gas over the clearing and up over the hill.

Choking and tearing up, Lauren clutched at the handle of the van, but drooped sleepily and collapsed on the ground. Six pairs of boots clumped up behind Lauren and men in gas masks sprayed the unconscious felon with another dose of sleeping gas. Laughing in their masks, the six men grabbed Lauren and tossed the dozing gangster over one shoulder. Four others gathered the case from the back of the van , then carried it to the waiting boat. The last man placed charges under the van then scurried back to the boat.

The cabin cruiser drifted into the river, then headed downstream as Hao Chin pushed a button on a remote control. Three hundred yards away, the Shamrock Delivery van exploded in a bright fireball.

(to be continued)

Another Fine Mess Chapter Three

Lauren paced furiously outside the lab, her hands gesticulating wildly as she expressed her anger and rage at anyone close enough. Behind her Yukiko sighed. She'd been around Lauren long enough to experience all the crime boss' moods and she knew the only way to get past the excitement and frustration of waiting was to get Lauren occupied in something else.

"Should we practice your Aikido Lauren?" she asked politely.

"I don't want to practice any bloody Aikido," Lauren said tersely. "I want to know what the hell is takin' them so long. I have an Owl to capture and a deadline to meet."

"We are well ahead of deadline, as you well know," Yukiko said. Her cell phone beeped and Yukiko apologized. "One moment."

Yukiko pulled her long dark hair away from her ear, the soft leather of her catsuit crinkling seductively, and put the cell phone to her ear. "Yes?" she said softly.

Lauren strained, but was unable to hear what was said. But the accent was unmistakeably New Jersey. So when Yukiko put the phone down, Lauren demanded, "What did Bethany want?"

Yukiko smiled enigmatically. "We are invited to the rooftop for a special demonstration."

Thirty minutes later, Lauren was laughing her head off, and slapping Suzy Q and Felicia on the back. "I don't know how ye did it, but it's bloody BRILLIANT! Consider your pay increased! The Old Pink Pigeon won't know what happened and we'll have her nailed but good!"

Suzy Q smiled. "That's right sugah. Ah think Felicia did a fantastic job with her li'l ol' bio scan."

"Well, it was your wedding my technology with yours that turned the trick, Suzy," said Felicia.

"Ladies please, we'll continue this mutual admiration society later," said Lauren. "Right now, we need to get this stuff in place."

"It is in place, boss," said Bethany. "We're gonna jump the Purple Peacock here."

"Well it would more properly be a pea hen," said Felicia. "But Bethany has the location correct."

"What's a pea hen?" asked Bethany.

"Well if we're referring to a certain bird Athene Noctua, then the feminine side is called for, wouldn't you agree?"

"Huh?" said Bethany. "I don't get it."

"You don't have to Bethany," said Lauren. "White Fowl is the one that's going to get it. Now how are we going to bring her here?"

"You will observe," said Yukiko," that Freya, Tasha and Daliyah aren't here. In fact, they are committing a well planned robbery of rare art at the Fleischer Gallery. It's well known, White Owl protects the art and museum treasures of this city, so she'll be in pursuit."

"Is that a fact?" muttered Lauren. She was answered by the squeal of screeching tires as a dark van rounded the corner at the alleyway to the Celtic Shipping Warehouse. The engine revved and the van roared toward the safety of the warehouse directly across from the office rooftop where Lauren waited with the rest of her gang.

"Here she comes!" Bethany pointed into the night sky and a white blur was whizzing toward the van, intent on nothing but the pursuit.

"Generators are at full strength an' the cannon is ready honey," said Suzy Q.

"Let her have it," shouted Lauren with glee. Suzy Q pressed two buttons on her control panel and a discharge of electricity arced across the sky, smiting the superheroine with a full jolt of high voltage energy. White Owl danced in the air, her hair spreading wide from her hair as the static charge shocked and confused her.

"Fox one" said Felicia, pressing on her own control board. Then..."Fox two! Both missiles running hot."

White Owl struggled to keep her altitude. She shook her head, trying to clear the cobwebs and attempting to blink away the little flashes of light still stuck to her retinas. As she lifted her eyes she saw the first of the two tiny rockets gleaming in the dark night, heading straight for her. In a panic, White Owl dodged left, breathing a sigh of relief as the first missile shot past her.
Then she felt the tug of something on her arm. Glancing down in shock she saw a large pink ribbon wrapped tightly around her left arm. The arm was pulled back and White Owl reached back with her other arm to pull the ribbon off. But the rocket was swifter, and with Felicia at the controls, move than maneuverable. The two rockets darted in and out, up and down, spewing their pink ribbon over all parts of White Owl and her costume. The more White Owl struggled, the tighter the ribbon became, pulling her arms and legs into a tight, well wrapped heroine.

Suzy Q fired her electro cannon once more and White Owl danced again in her cocooned form, the drooped unconscious and tumbled to the harsh asphalt 40 feet below her.

"Oh! Be careful ye daft boffin!" said Lauren. "She's not supposed to be injured! A fall like that coulda killed her!"

"Not likely, sugah," said Suzy Q. "Look."

Lauren glanced over the edge of the building and saw Freya holding an unconscious form wrapped in pink. "Not bad, hey? I play bases ball?"

Lauren let out a sigh of relief, then shouted. "Well don't just stand there! I don't pay you to lollygag."

"Actually Lauren, you do," said Yukiko. "Remember the time we kidnapped that industrialist's daughter in Japan?" Lauren grimaced at Yukiko's pun.

"Listen," said Lauren, waving a pointed finger under Yukiko's calm reserved nose. "I finally got the bird brain to stop making puns. Don't you start now..." She turned away and headed for the roof access. Lauren didn't see Yukiko snicker quietly with Suzy Q and Felicia.

A few minutes later, Lauren preceded her henchwomen into another part of the lab. Freya and Daliyah were settling White Owl's drooping and bound form onto a table with restraints built into it. The two gangsters cinched the restraints on tightly and stepped back just as White Owl began groaning.

Lauren stepped over to her hated nemesis and grabbed a handful of the bound heroine's hair. With her other hand she slapped White Owl across the face. "Wake up, ye nocturnal menace!"

White Owl's eyes fluttered, then with a sudden realization at her predicament she struggled. The pink ribbons were too strong for her, however, and the added restraints were not making matters any easier. Her eyes focused on Lauren and she hissed, "You!"

Lauren tipped her fedora and smiled. "At your service Grey Crow! Though I doubt I'll be seein' much of ye after this."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, my dear little birdy, that this time my gals and I have finally found a way to stop you...permanently! Those bonds are designed to withstand strength up to Captain Valiant's level, which we all know you're not. And Felicia here has designed one more thing that will keep you completely helpless."

Lauren beckoned and Felicia stepped forward with a silvery hoop about the size of White Owl's head. In her proper Oxford accent, she explained, "We have always had trouble holding you in the past White Owl, because we generally focused on stopping your strength. But all too often you won with your brain too."

Gently, Felicia placed the hoop around White Owl's head.

Continuing her lecture, Felicia said, "So this device will stop both. It won't keep you from thinking, but it fires an interrupter into your neuron flow. Any mental commands to your voluntary muscles will be stopped--or controlled from this board. But since our client wants you alive, then your involuntary functions will be left alone."

Felicia stepped back to the control box and twisted a dial. White Owl grimaced, then her face went blank. Above her, the panel on the wall measured a steady strong heartbeat.
"She's all yours boss." Lauren laughed.

Picking up a cell phone, Lauren shot several pictures of her pet superheroine. Then she dialed Hao Chin's phone. "I have a package ready for ye," she said. "Want to see some pictures?"

She transmitted the images to Chin then picked up the conversation. "I've done my bit. Now tell me when and where you want her." She listened a moment nodding.. "All righty then. You'll receive delivery tomorrow night AFTER I confirm the deposit. Good Night!" She snapped the phone shut and tossed it to Freya, who fumbled and dropped it.

"Guess you don't play Bases Ball," giggled Lauren. She looked at Yukiko. "Tomorrow night. Chin said to come alone."

"You don't plan to go alone do you?" asked Yukiko, nervously.

"Of course I do," said Lauren. "You'll be in the other car with the rest of the girls. I may be crazy but I'm not insane. The place we picked is a small valley surrounded by many hills and the river. You lassies will take command on the hills and watch. If anything crazy happens, then you swoop down and save my arse!"

Yukiko felt a headache coming on, but nodded.
to be continued

Another Fine Mess Chapter Two

In the wee hours of the morning, the coffee was brewing and lights were on in the main conference room of Celtic Van Lines and Shipping. Lauren sat at the head of the table, her eyes fluttering slightly from the long night and the wine with Hao Chin. Still she was able to rouse herself to full awareness as she surveyed her gaggle of girl gangsters like a queen with her courtiers. Though each member of Lauren's inner circle held an undying, unflinching loyalty to the boss, each of them also possessed at least one highly destructive skill or mindset beneficial to the organization.

Yukiko sat next to Lauren, and opened the meeting. The slim Japanese woman spoke softly, and with perfect diction and control. Her body was perfectly chiseled, almost sculpted, and bespoke both beauty and power. As she stroked her dark hair away from her ear, Lauren noticed the ending of the Dragon tattoo; Yukiko's family crest.

Lauren had saved Yukiko's life when a rival Yakuza clan tried to destroy Yukiko's family. The rival clan had been destroyed by Lauren and Yukiko; but now the young woman considered herself bound to Lauren for as long as the red headed gangster lived. It was a matter of honor.

Bethany stood up and handed out thick manila folders as Suzy Q started a power point projector. Lauren's eyes followed the comely Bethany for a moment, watching the cute little wiggle the Jersey girl put into her walk. But Lauren was eyes forward as Suzy Q began her presentation.

""Hi y'all" began Suzy Q; her accent placing her somewhere well below the Mason Dixon line. She had a dancer's grace, poise and a body to match; suggesting a familiarity with the carnal side of life. Her blonde hair and good looks disguised the fact that she had graduated with advanced degrees from both Tulane and MIT with advanced degrees before the age of twenty. Suzy Q discovered though, that even with the credentials, men would judge her by her looks, rather than her talents. She was appalled and disappointed; and quite ready when Lauren recruited her from a dance bar just outside Mobile.

Suzy Q cleared her throat and began the presentation. "The challenge before us is to stop White Owl. Now any time we've captured her before, she's defeated us through sheer brute strength, some advanced healing factor in her metabolism or some combination of both." Suzy Q nodded her platinum locks across the table to her colleague.

"So Felicia and I have developed a two pronged attack that will allow us to both capture her, and contain her for delivery to Hao Chin."

"An' how long will it take t' put all of it together?" asked Lauren, leaning forward, hands on her chin.

"That depends on White Owl," said Felicia with an upperclass British lilt in her voice. Felicia possessed an angelic appearance and a heart that would frighten Satan himself. She had been a pre-med student at St Matthews College in Oxford, but her specialty had been vivisection. Felicia had been asked to leave after the unexplained disappearances of four lab partners. "We need to take a biometric reading, so we can calibrate the missiles to her unique physiology."

"MISSILES!! JAYZUS CHRIST!" swore Lauren. "As much as it pains me to say it, Felicia, we want the Blue Parakeet ALIVE, and not dead, savvy?" The pretty blonde nodded prettily.

"Oh don't worry, sweetie," said Suzy Q, coming to her partner's defense. "These are SPECIAL missiles. And if they work out as planned, well then, we'll have lots of buyers lining up. More money, sugah!" Lauren smiled at that and looked around the table.

Freya was looking up from her Wacom. Her dark hair was severely short and framed her face in a utilitarian way. "Owl vill be at park this afternoon. Is beeg revealink."

"You mean the Grand Unveiling?" corrected Yukiko gently. Freya bobbed her here head vigorously.

"Da, Grand Unweilink at Wictory Park. Is big statuary of Qveen City Heros?"

"I think she means the new police memorial in Victory Park, Lauren," said Yukiko. "They're unveiling the new names today, and White Owl is the guest of honor."

Lauren stifled a yawn and looked at her science team. "Will that be enough time?" she asked.

"Oh sure sugah," said Suzy Q with a giggle in her voice. " I already have the bio scanner in a li'l ol' camera. The Ol' Buzzard won't know we're even there. An' once we have her li'l ol' bio signature, then Felicia here takes ovah!"

"And we'll be able to find her no matter who she is!" quipped Felicia.

"What do ye mean, no matter who she is?" asked Lauren.

Bethany laughed. "You don't think she's White Owl all the time do ya boss? I mean she's gotta have a real life, somethin' normal?"

"Then why does she dress in a skimpy leotard an' bother me so much," said Lauren, finally drooping over and falling asleep at the table. Yukiko looked over and sighed.

"This meeting is over. We will meet again at noon to put the first phase of the operation into action. Daliyah, will you and Freya stay with me? I will need your assistance." With gentle motions, borne of long practice, the three women gently carried their unconscious leader into her bed. They spent the night in the room with Lauren, taking turns keeping watch over her until the rosy dawn crept high into the sky.
*****

Statuary Glen at Victory Park was decorated with red white and blue bunting for the newest dedication at the city's police memorial. In the parking lot, well away from the main stands, a Celtic Van Lines truck was parked. But instead of a cargo of risers or seats, it held the cramped control room for Suzy Q's audacious scheme. Lauren was wide awake, and fidgeted nervously, while Suzy Q and Felicia tinkered with the settings on the control panel. As her eyes focused on a monitor, Lauren asked, "Are you sure this will work?" for the fifteenth time.

"Yes, all we need is the White Duck and her goose is cooked," said Felicia.

"Actually, it won't be all that simple sugah," said Suzy Q. But as long as the Radah, is working we'll be able to track her an' lead her into our trap."

Not to be outdone, Felicia said, "The biometric scanner will also enable us to work out effective countermeasures for overcoming the Grey Turkey's powers--keeping the bird dormant for as long as it takes."

On the monitor, Lauren spotted the white streak against the pale blue sky just seconds before Bethan shouted, "Thar she blows!" White Owl slowed to a gentle glide, then landed gracefully on the stage, shaking hands with both Mayor Pettingill and Police Commissioner Linseed.

"Look at her, struttin' like a prize pullet" humphed Suzy Q.

"That she may be, but I'm countin' on ye to pluck her and dress her too," replied Lauren.

"Don't worry," said Felicia. "I like boning birds." The van pealed with laughter as Felicia's confusion grew. When understanding broke across her face, the deep red of embarrassment burned in her fair cheeks.

"I'm so sorry, that was most unladylike," she stammered.

"Not to worry lass, I've been known to do it too," said Lauren with a sly wink.

The ceremony went off without any further difficulties and was winding down when Lauren asked, "Did we get enough?"

"And then some," said Felicia. "I should be able to have this ready within the next week. And after that, no more White Owl."

"Then why are we sittin' here?" asked Lauren. "With the finest in front o' us an' White Owl there too, I'd say the city is open to a crime wave right about now. How 'bout it ladies?"

A resounding cheer rocked the van as it pulled from the parking lot.

to be continued

Another Fine Mess Part One

The game ended after nine innings, and the Gems had come out on the losing end to the Pirates. The parking garages around the stadium emptied quickly, and Hao Chin, an import dealer from Singapore found himself alone in the third unfamiliar garage close to midnight. Finally spotting his rental car, he quickly crossed through the eerie shadows and pressed the unlock tab on his key fob.

The car beeped twice, and Hao Chin sighed, realizing that the hoped for rendezvous had still not occured. He put his hand on the handle of his car and felt a sharp object about his neck.

"On your kness Hao Chin, or I'll let Daliyah turn you into dog food." Chin dropped to his knees, his fingers interlaced behind his head.

A dark oriental woman reached into his pocket, and pulled out his wallet and passport. Studying it, she said, "I'm Yukiko, Lauren's top lieutenant. She sent me to meet you and to hear your offer."

Despite his submissive pose, Hao Chin held his ground. "No, I will not deal with mere intermediaries or minions."

He felt the knife at his throat again, as Yukiko crouched in front of him. He lithe body exuded the grace of a dancer, or perhaps a skilled martial artist, and Hao Chin realized she could take his head off without much effort. "Don't go calling names Mon," he heard in a heavily accented voice.

"I am afraid Daliyah doesn't have much patience with intolerance, Mr. Chin," said Yukiko. And in don't have mch patience, period. Once more, the offer?"

"No!" said Chin. ""My request was simple. And my orders from my patron were explicit. I am to deal with Lauren O'Rourke, alone. Failing that, then death would be welcome to my honor."

A black Mecedes turned on its headlamps, and the door opened. "A'right Chin, ye got y'r meeting. I'm Lauren O'Rourke." The slender, elegant redhead was dressed in a cream colored linen pantsuit, with a green silk blouse underneath setting off her emerald eyes. A cream colored fedora was perched at a Sinatraesque angle on top of her head, completing the look. Confidence exuded from her like an exquisite perfume.

"No, no, don't get up on my account," said Lauren, a soft Celtic lilt matching her fey features. "And we O'Rourke's have the Sight,; so I'll know if you're trying to pull a fast one. " She dismissed her guards and nodded toward the Mercedes.

"Supposin' I treat this as a business meeting, then. Would you be amenable to a late seafood dinner?" asked Lauren.

"I suppose so, provided you call me again," deadpanned Chin.
Lauren tittered politely at the lame joke, and thirty minutes later, both Lauren and Chin were seated in a private room at Mantooth's Fine Seafood Restaurant. After the waiter brought the food, the doors were shut and the two of them enjoyed a bit of privacy as Yukiko and and Daliyah provided security just outside the door.

"I thought people in your profession preferred eating pasta," said Hao Chin, as he sliced into a large salmon steak.

"You have me confused with the bloody Italians," replied Lauren, nibbling daintily on shrimp scampi. "We Irish eat anythin' and are glad of it."

"My apologies, I meant no offense."

"None taken," said Lauren. She waited a moment while the wineglasses were refilled, then said. "Now down to business. What brings an importer like you halfway around the world. It must be something unique if you can't find it in Singapore."

Chin wiped his face with a napkin and nodded. "Very rare, indeed. In fact, one of a kind. You might even say a rara avis."

"You're importin' bloody BIRDS?" Lauren sounded incredulous. "An' just what sort of unique bird calls Queen City home?"

"My buyer requests a predatory bird. One which you have as much reason to see gone as I do to see acquired. An Owl."

Lauren's elfin face did a poor job of masking her surprise. "You want my help in capturin' that beaked busybody?" Tossing her head back, Lauren convulsed in laughter.

"Oh Laddie," she said eventually, wiping a tear from her eye. "I'd be DELIGHTED to help you acquire this item. Hell, I may even do it gratis!" At this, Lauren's lieutenants gasped. She waved at the two of them.

"Don't worry lassies. I haven't addled my wits yet," said Lauren. Turning back to Hao Chin, she added, "So what's in it for me, besides gettin' rid of the Hooter, I mean?"

Chin took a pen and small notebook from his pocket, then scribbled a number on it. He slid the folded paper to his hostess, then sat back with a satisfied smile on his face. Lauren took up the paper and studied it carefully. "Is this your offer? Or is this a joke?"

Chin frowned, "That's my offer."

"That's a joke," Lauren replied, wadding up the slip of paper and burning it in the ashtray. "I take all the risks, lay out all the capital for a capture AND containment system, prepare the acquisition for transport, and YOU get all the reward? Not bloody likely at this price. I'd go into the hole on this one. I think you can do better. I'll give you just one more chance."

Chin looked worried. Trembling, he picked up his pad and scrutinized the numbers again. "Just a moment ago, you said you were willing to do this for free," he protested.

"That was me heart talkin'. But where these contracts are concerned, I stifle the little bastard an' listen to me brain. Now are you going to write? or am I going to walk out and never call you again?"

Chin began to write with Yukiko standing over one shoulder. He was about to slide the pad back when Lauren said, "Add another zero."

"You can't be serious!" protested Chin.

"I'm always serious when I talk money," said Lauren. "And I want half now and half on delivery. And I want to know who the buyer is. After all, someone wants to buy a superheroine, he must think he's pretty hot stuff."

"I will agree to half now and half on delivery," said Chin. "But I will not tell you who the buyer is. After all, you might try to undercut me and offer him a better deal. Now I can transfer the money early tomorrow morning if you'd like?"

Lauren opened a cell phone and pressed one button, "Not necessary. Hold on a minute." She spoke into the phone. "Hello Leticia? Its me, be prepared for a large transfer." Lauren rattled off a long series of numbers. Then she handed the phone to Chin.

"This is Leticia, my Bahamian banker. She's willing to arrange a transfer now. And I'll sign any paperwork in the meanwhile?"

"Oh no, no paperwork, Ms O'Rourke," said Chin. "I trust you'll stick to the terms discussed. And there should be soomething special just for you upon sucessful completion? Call it a bonus."

Chin turned to the telephone, then scribbled something down and handed the confirmation to Lauren. Lauren nodded then spoke to Chin again, "I'll contact you in three weeks to arrange the transfer on my end. I trust that will be sufficient time?"

Chin agreed. "I will be travelling around the country, working on a few other acquisitions. Your Western styles appeals to many in my markets. You have my contact information?" Lauren nodded and Chin stood and bowed, then showed himself out.

Once the door closed Yukiko said, "I do not trust him."

"You'd be a right foo to do so," agreed Lauren. "But the money is good an' if it rids us of the White Chicken, then so much the better." She stood and stretched, her taut form exciting both Yukiko and Daliyah. Fully aware of the reactions she elicited, Lauren turned back to the two women and said, "Get the Council together. We need to make plans to cook the Grey Goose!"
(to be continued)

Fever Pitch

The plane set down in Hub City right on schedule. I looked up from my Ipod and waited patiently for the other passengers on the Trans Air Commuter flight to deplane, then grabbed my messenger bag and followed along. After grabbing my suitcase from the carousel, I flagged a taxi and settled in.

"Where ya goin' lady?" asked the driver; his Hub City accent nasally and distinct.

"75 Basin Street," I replied. "It's in Comisky."

"Yeah, I know the neighborhood. Grew up a few blocks away on Canal." He eased the long yellow Impala into traffic and followed the expressway around Hub to the Comisky exit. As he drove, we chatted, typical small talk.

"You from Hub?" he asked.

"No, Queen City," I smiled, seeing his ears droop and knowing what was coming next.

"Yeah, home of the Gems," he said. "Not a bad team, but nothin' on our Bruins."

"Well, yes, we've had a rough few years," I said. "But we have a more recent World Series than your Bruins."

At that the baseball talk stopped. "C'n I ask what brings a nice lady like you t' Hub City?"

"Oh a personal visit, and a trip to my doctor."

"You doin' both in one trip?" he asked.

"I'm doing both in one stop," I replied. "My friend and my physician are both Dr Abu Mirelleh." The cab pulled up to the large brownstone Alyssa owned. the lower level was where she held her private practice, the upper two floors were her elegant home. I stepped from the cab and paid the gentleman, complete with a generous tip; then looked around Alyssa's neighborhood.
Her house fronted on a large park, part of a square. In the grass, I saw small children flying kites or playing on the swings, with their mothers or nannies close at hand watching intently. A Comisky patrol car drove up the block and I waved at the police officer, smiling as she waved back.

I walked up the steps to the front door and opened it wide. "Anybody home?" I called out.

"Hi Athena, I'll be right down," I heard Alyssa call from upstairs. I set my bags against the wall and sat in the waiting room. A moment later, Alyssa stepped into the exam room, with my folder in her hand. She was of average height, but slender, and her dark black hair hung down to the small of her back. Her skin was a golden brown, betraying her Arab roots; and her eyes were filled with intelligence. She smiled as she saw me and I stood up to give her a hug.

"Gosh you look fantastic Alyssa," I said.

"I could say the same about you, roomie," she said. Her accent was noticeable but not thick; and served more to enhance her exotic looks than detract from them. "But that's why you're here isn't it?" A hint of a smile played at her lips.

"Thank you for arranging your schedule to see me a bit earlier than usual, Athena," said Alyssa.

"This time, I need to be out of town for a while."

"Oh really?" I said interested. "Is it a continuing education credit?"
"Nothing so mundane,"said Alyssa, handing me a hospital gown. "Why don't you slip into this, and I'll fill you in during the examination." I frowned, looking at the less than flattering cover, but knew it was a necessity.

I changed quickly, and Alyssa began her exam. "Breathe deep, hold it." The stethoscope was cool against my bare skin. Alyssa listened intently, moving the stethoscope around. The exam moved swiftly and after it was over, Alyssa nodded.

"Good news?" I said.

"You're as healthy as a horse," Alyssa said. "But what can you expect from someone who has goddess given healing? What I wouldn't give for that now." She smiled, knowing its a secret I share with only one or two people. "Off hand, I'd say you have the body of a woman much younger than your 29 years."

"Hey watch it Doctor. Or I'll tell YOUR age." That brought a laugh and I began dressing again, sitting on the exam table as Alyssa finished her notes.

"You asked why I had to reschedule your appointment. Have you ever heard of Hickory Grove, Missouri?"

"Should I?" I asked.

"Not really. There have been a few things in the paper, but it's been pretty well kept quiet. Some sort of disease has broken loose there. Early indications are it's a variation on the bubonic plague. So far, it's been quarantined to a few families. But the CDC asked for a few volunteers to help contain the disease and to do further studies. It's a mutation, as I said, and normal antibiotics aren't working."

"So why you?"

"My background in immunology research and immunization make me a good candidate for the research team. And I WANT to go Athena. Not for any notoriety, but because I can do some good. Isn't that why you do it?"

I nodded. "That's exactly why. That whole, 'with great power comes great responsibility' thing. So when do you go?"

"My flight is tomorrow. I fly into Joplin and catch a ride with a truck from Tipton pharmaceuticals. Any time a large dose of drugs is shipped , a doctor has to ride along to verify nothing was changed out."

"Sounds like it's a terrific opportunity for you," I said. "Be careful Alyssa, I don't want you to get hurt. I'd hate to break in a new doctor."

"I don't think you'll need to. I'm off to the lab, rather than the hospitals. So I'll be getting my hands dirty in clean rooms, so to speak."

My stomach gurgled, and Alyssa laughed.

"Lets go get this taken care of," I said. "My treat."

"All right, but this still doesn't excuse you from paying the bill for service rendered," Alyssa chided.

After a delicious and decadent lunch, I bid Alyssa goodbye and caught a late flight back to Queen City. Alyssa promised to call me after she got to Joplin and to keep in touch.
I spent the night on a swift patrol, but Queen City seemed too caught up in the first warm nights of spring and crime seemed to have taken the night off. I went to bed relatively early, and slept peacefully.

It was late afternoon when Alyssa's number turned up on my cell phone. "Hey Alyssa," I said. "I thought you were going to Joplin in the morning."

"I've been here since about ten," she replied. "But there was a hold up with the truck from Tipton. Apparently, the original driver got ill, though not with the plague; and they had to scramble to get a backup driver. We've been on the road here about an hour with the first supply of the vaccine. We should be in Hickory Grove in another hour or two. We'll still have time to immunize the city, and possibly save some lives already down with the disease."

"Sounds good to me," I said. I was about to wish Alyssa luck when I heard a loud noise over Alyssa's phone. "What was that?" I asked.

All I got was static. "Alyssa? ALYSSA!!!"

I heard a groan. "The truck..ambush...unnnhhh."

Through the telephone I heard people scrambling through thick brush. Voices, harsh and masculine. "Truck appears all right sir."

"Who's in the cab with the driver?"

"The doctor. It's a woman!"

While the drama was unfolding on my cell phone, I pulled my White Owl phone from my purse and dialed Captain Winslow. "Captain, it's White Owl," I said, trying to maintain an urgent but not panicked tone.

"Good to hear from you," said Winslow. "What's up?"

"A truck hijacking, near Hickory Grove Missouri. Can you get their police alerted?"
"

Yeah I can do that, but it may take them some time to get there. I'll let the Missouri State troopers know, too."

"Fantastic," I replied. "Oh and one more thing."

"What's that?"

"Let them know I'm coming--should be there in about four hours."

"You got it."

I closed the "Owl-phone" and listened intently to Alyssa's drama.

"Hey she's a doc, right?"

"Yeah"

"Pete and Barney are in pretty sad shape. Maybe she can fix 'em up."

"All right, dump the driver and bring the doctor. But make it quick, the cops will be here soon." There was a pause, and I heard the last voice say, " Maybe even sooner. She's got a cell phone open and on." Alyssa's line went dead.

Five minutes seemed a long time as I swiftly changed. Never before had the NuSilk seemed so constricting and grasping as I tried to pull it over my form. But I soon was aloft and on my way to Missouri.

I landed in Hickory Grove near midnight and was met by the Sheriff, Greg Saunders. An older lawman, he still stood straight and whipcord thin. His dark hair was just starting to grow gray and an aura of easy authority hung on his shoulders. "Glad to meet you Ms Owl, jest wish it had been under better circumstances."

"The pleasure is mine," I said, taking his hand. "What's the situation?"

"We found the truck, empty. No sign of the doctor or the medicine. The driver was in pretty bad shape too. There were helicopter tracks near the truck. Mah guess is they off loaded the vaccine into a chopper and flew it outta here." Saunders handed me a slip of paper.

This came in about an hour ago, White Owl. Their demands for the ransom."

I studied it intently. "Ten Million Dollars?"

"Yep, an' no chance of Hickory Grove gainin' that much in the 24 hours they gave us." Saunders nodded and I looked over my shoulder to see a heavy man in a white lab coat approaching.

"Is this her?" he asked the sheriff.

"Yeah," Sheriff Saunders replied. "Doctor Westin, meet White Owl. I was just apprisin' her of the situation." Westin was maybe 5'6" tall, round where Saunders was thin and balding where Saunders still had a full head of hair.

Westin shook my hand without emotion and said, "Thank God you're here. You brought the vaccine, right?"

"I did not. I am here for other reasons."

Westin glared at me and said, "They gave us a 24 hour deadline White Owl, but I don't have that much time. I have 15 people in a ward over at the hospital dyin' of this plague an' in 24 hours we'll have more. The genie's out of the bottle right now and this vaccine would save lives."

"Do you have time to get more?" I asked.

"Not in time. Tipton shipped all they had, and they were the only ones working on this."

I turned to look at Sheriff Saunders. "Do you have the number for the Joplin airport? I need to check something out."

Saunders looked surprised, but nodded. Twenty minutes later, and using the sheriff's authority I had the answer I wanted.

"Air traffic included an unidentified helicopter in the area about five hours ago. They tracked it to someplace called Baptiste Mountain?"

Saunders pointed at a topographical map of the area. "Sure! Nothin' there though except an old monastery. Benedictine order owned it. It was abandoned about forty years ago though. The vineyards are only so much bramble now, and no one goes there."

"Sounds like a place for the rats to gather," I said. "And there's no better rat catcher than an owl." I put my hand on the Sheriff's shoulder and added, "Get your deputies and meet me out there in three hours or so."

"You can't go alone!" both Saunders and Westin said, almost in unison.

"I can't bring an army, either, I said. "They'd spot us a mile away and begin to use us for target practice. Alone, I have a chance to get the drop on them. I need to get moving, there are lives at stake. I'll see you soon Sheriff."

I turned to leap into the air and felt Westin's hammy fist on my bare shoulder. "White Owl, NO! You were exposed to me and to the Sheriff! YOU could have the disease."

I shook the arm off and leapt into the air. "Sorry Doctor, something in my ear, I can't hear you." I flew off into the night, praying my healing factor would be able to stop any bugs I picked up from the doctor.

My prayers didn't seem to have any effect. My insides were churning and I could feel my vision blurring. Apparently, the accelerated healing also applied to accelerated symptoms of an unknown disease. I saw Baptiste Mountain looming in the moonlight, and brought myself down in the woods at the foot of the monastery.

"Better climb from here," I thought. "I can hug the mountain and make it harder for them to see." One advantage to my powers is that I can free climb without any any pitons or ropes, but if I'd been infected, it was taking a toll on me.

I reached for a rock spur, and watched the ground blur again, my head pounding. But a vision of Alyssa also was in my head and I spurred myself upward. The yards of the bluff dropped below as I ascended and as I reached the top, I saw no activity in back of the monastery. Right above me was a broken stained glass window. I leaped onto the sill and saw three men milling among the pillars. I couldn't see Alyssa, but I knew I needed to act.

I covered my eyes and jumped through the window, my left foot kicking one man in the chin and sending him reeling backward.

Behind me, I heard someone shout, "Look out boss, it's White Owl." The boss dropped to the floor, and I landed a bit harder than I planned. Shakily I got to my feet and saw five other men I threw a bop ball, striking a second man and dropping him to the floor with a heavy thud. He groaned once and stopped moving. I dropped behind a set of crates marked Tipton and considered my options.

"Stop her you fool! She's only one woman!" A large man with a beret seemed to be giving orders. Since the boss was out, he must be the lieutenant. I threw a paint ball, striking him in the face. Orange paint smeared his glasses and his rifle shot went high, rebounding off the marble font.

Rolling out from behind the crates I sprung to my feet and decked a fourth man.

I stood, gasping for breath, losing myself for a moment. I heard guns clicking on either side of me. I looked to my left and right, spotting the last two goons aiming pistols at me. "They have me flanked," I thought. "And I can barely stand."

I felt my knees buckle and dropped to the floor. "So why stand, when these goons are dumb enough to shoot one another?" Above me the two pistols barked, and each man groaned, clutching non-fatal wounds.

The stone floor was cool against my fevered skin. I struggled to stand up; knowing I had to find Alyssa. Was she even still alive? I had to hope she was.

I got to one knee and wiped my head with a NuSilk glove. Behind me I heard the click of a pistol being cocked. Whirling, I heard the sound and shrieked in pain as a bullet ripped through my left shoulder. Three more bullets flattened against my NuSilk leotard, in a tight grouping between my breasts. I groaned, clutching at my wounded shoulder and dropped to the floor again. From the shadows of a large support pillar, the boss loomed over me.

"You counted me out too early, White Owl," he said, stepping into the light and aiming his gun. "Fatal mistake. And since it appears you're bulletproof around your heart, this one will go right between your eyes."

"Keep gloating," I thought, using my right arm to release one more ball from my belt. I threw the ball, shakily, past the boss's shoulder. He laughed, but the gun never wavered in his hand.

"Your aim is off a little there, birdie. I assume that the disease is eating you up inside, making it impossible to aim correctly. Not that it matters, because in approximately two seconds you'll be dea..."

BOOOOOMM!!! The flash-bang grenade exploded behind him, shifting the heavy granite cross over the boss' head. The cross tumbled over landing with a heavy thud on the boss' head and his gun spoke once more, shattering the remaining rosette window. He dropped to the floor, unconscious under the heavy icon.

"I...I think you counted ME out too soon," I said, drooping unconscious against the vaccines.

I don't know how long I lay there, but the next thing I saw was the familiar and concerned face of Alyssa shaking me. "White Owl? Are you all right?" Behind her, I could see Sheriff Saunders and his deputies taking the gang members prisoner.

"I feel ... Can you give me a shot of that vaccine? Then maybe you and Doctor Westin can get it down to Hickory Grove and maybe save some lives."

Alyssa smiled. "Count on it. But you're not going anywhere for about twenty four hours. I'd say it would take about that long for your wound to heal too."

I nodded, then drifted off again as the EMTs loaded me on the gurney.

The End. (disclaimer--Adapted FREELY from World's Finest 245 a Vigilante story by Bill Kunkel and art by Gray Morrow)